I Have No Faith...

...in people when it comes to spiritual beliefs and I believe that I have explained why in at least one post or another. This was a thread on facebook that a "friend" of mine posted. The comments, although intended to be comical, just made my eyes bug out. Why are people so critical of other people's beliefs?


GK: asks what do you say to an atheist after they sneeze?? Anyone?? lol

Yesterday at 4:48pm · Comment ·

LC: Kazuntite!! Lol Idk
Yesterday at 4:50pm

GK: lmao! thats a good one
Yesterday at 4:51pm

NP: Hope u didn't get any on you
Yesterday at 5:15pm

AJJ : "You're f#cked!" Lol sike just playing...I don't know good question.
Yesterday at 5:17pm

Norris: You don't say anything and respect their beliefs. That's what I do.
Yesterday at 5:30pm · Delete

TU: Jesus loves you! LOL!
Yesterday at 5:31pm


GK: When u die nothin happens???
Yesterday at 5:45pm

CM: Go to hell?? lol They'd probably love that.
Yesterday at 5:58pm

Norris: Wow!! I can't even joke on this one because of the negative judgements about other people's beliefs. And people wonder why I stopped going to church. Why can't people just respect what other people believe?
Yesterday at 6:55pm · Delete

NJ: Welp I think Norris just shut this topic all the way down. NEXT! Lmao
55 minutes ago


I just didn't think that this was funny. If someone had made fun of Christianity, Islam, or Judiasm, I don't think there would have been any LOLs in the comments.

I Refuse To Allow...

...anyone to make me feel like what I do makes me a bad person.

I refuse to allow anyone to make me feel bad about myself.

I refuse to allow anyone to use me for their gain.

I refuse to allow anyone to mistake my generousity for weakness.

I just had enough. I really have. After 13 years of dating and relationships, i've come up with nothing. I'm absolutely tired of it. I just can't deal with the requirements, stipulations, non-compromising situations, disrespect, deception, and just plain stupidity. I'm just tired of it.

I can't change the type of person that I am, but what I will do is change the type of person I choose to date. After thinking about it i've come to the conclusion that my biggest issue with dating is overlooking and forgiving issues that I have with people. I try to be realistic and understand that people aren't perfect and that they will make mistakes. But as strong as I think I am, i'm actually pretty weak when it comes to dating. Family and friends know that i'm strong and aggressive, but when it comes to dating, i'm weak as hell.

I actually have noticed that the older i"ve gotten, the weaker I have gotten. My thinking is that i'm getting that "get a man before I get too old" feeling. I can't think that way. I just can't. I've got to change my mindset and know that I don't HAVE to romantically have someone in my life to complete me. I've got to learn to enjoy me.

Well after those 13 years, i've come to realize that I have to change my tactics. How i'm going to do that, i'm not sure, but something has to give. So first thing Monday morning...

I Don't Understand How...

...some people think. I really can't figure them out. I know i'm not perfect, but I at least think about things before I do them. Here's what inspired this post.

Wednesday, a friend of mine (Friend A) said that he wanted to go get something to drink. I was tired and sore from working out at the gym, so I suggested we go Thursday instead to which he said "cool". I also called another friend of mine (Friend B) and invited him also since the 3 of us were kinds making this hanging out a habit. We were to meet at 8:30pm at Joe's On Juniper to have a few drinks and some wings.

So Thursday comes and about 8:00pm I was just about to walk out the door. Something told me to confirm the time. So I text Friend A to confirm the time with him. I get a text back that said "I'm at the gym in Camp Creek, i'll text you when I get to my car." Now I sat back down and started thinking that if you were to meet people at 8:30 why would you be at a gym 20 miles from your house at 8:00? I didn't understand it.

I get a text from Friend B asking what time to meet and I explain to him the situation. He says cool. He's going to take a shower and to call him back with a new time. So I just suggested then that we just meet there at 9 to give him time to get his shower and make it to the restaurant. I sent Friend A a text telling him to just meet us at the restaurant when he could.

So I got in my car at 8:30 so that I could get to Midtown and find a place to park and go ahead and get a table. I made it there and rode around looking for a parking space before I found one around the corner. Something told me not to get out of the car, so I sat there for a while on the phone talking to my new boo (not Tuscany; that's over). I look up at the clock and it's 9:15. So I called Friend B to see how far away he is. He didn't answer. At that point, my mind told me to just drive back home. So I sent him a text saying "I just wanted to know how far away you are so that I don't get a table too soon". I get one back saying "Oh, i'm just getting dressed". I sent one back saying, "I'm just going to head home. I don't feel like waiting another hour". And I started my car and start driving home pissed off.

About 5 minutes into my drive Friend A called me and said that he was about 20 minutes away. I told him that I was just heading home because I was no longer in the mood to be around anyone. Of course I told him about himself and reminded him what ADVANCED NOTICE is when you are altering plans. His excuse for being late: He got free 1-day passes to go to the gym with his co-workers and wanted to use it. Really? So you wait to go the gym at 7:30 when you are supposed to meet your friends at 8:30? Really.

While talking to him, Friend B calls and without even telling Friend A, I just swapped calls (yeah I know it was rude) and started getting Friend B together. He asked me to come back because he was on his way and told me that I texted him initially he was just getting home and needed time to unwind. I asked him why the hell couldn't he have just said that before I got in my fucking car and drove 20 damn miles for him to be at home unwinding!!!!!!!

Maybe I just overreacted, but if you tell me a time for something, that's when I will be ready to do it. If I can't do something or will be late, i'll give you as much notice as possible. I always thought that this was common courtesy. But I guess it isn't all that common.

I've always been courteous to people and I always keep my word when I say that I will do something. But it's getting to the point that I feel that I am being taken for granted. I refuse to feel that way anymore. I'm tired of being the good one who everyone can rely on, but having no one to rely on for myself. I'm sick of it.

I guess my issue is that because I always keep my word to do something or give plenty of notice that I can't, I expect other people to be just as responsible. Well I was always told that if you never expect anything, you won't be disappointed.

So I guess what i'll do is treat people how I am treated. I'll start committing to events and happenings and not show up or be extremely late. I'll stop returning emails, text messages, and phone calls. I'll stop jumping up to help people when they need something. I'll stop being a shoulder to cry on when a boyfriend has them crying. I'll just be a bitch when I don't need to.

Since no one notices the good shit about me, let's see how soon they can notice the bad.

People Can Be So...

...damn rude and inconsiderate that it makes no sense.

I went to Starbucks again today to get my turkey croissant, banana bread, and peach green tea. I walked in and got in line as any normal person would. Some guy just walked from over by the newspaper stand and got in line in front of me. I figured that he was in line before me and just stepped to get a paper so I didn't say anything.

So i'm looking in the case and deciding what I wanted and he's ordering his thimble of coffee and looking at his paper. By this time, there are about 4 people behind me waiting to order. After he orders, what do you think he did? Go ahead and guess. I'll give you a second.

This bastard proceeds to put his newspaper down right on the register counter and start reading it. Mind you that there are 5 people waiting to get to said counter to order their food. Since he had already (somewhat) gotten under my skin, I took action. I picked up my juice out of the cold, wet cooler and sat it right on top of his newspaper. The lady at the register smiled and let out a little giggle, but I was dead serious. He looked at me as though he wanted to say something and I gave him a Tasha Mack look that said "SAY SOMETHING"!

He got his paper, got out of the line and moved over under the "wait here" sign like his rude ass should have.

I would have liked to just know what he thought gave him the privilege to read his damn paper right there in way of other people who were waiting in line. I know he saw us because he looked at us when he jumped line. I should have checked his ass about that.

What the hell is wrong with people that they think that no one else matters but them. I don't get it. I really don't. As means as I can be, I am 99% considerate of how my actions affect other people. Whether it be while driving, in the grocery store, at a restaurant, or wherever, I try to be considerate of others.

Wouldn't the world be a better place if we all thought about how our actions affected others and acted accordingly?

It Takes Just One...

...person to redeem the indiscretions of others. Here's why I say that.

A few weeks ago, I headed to my physician's office for my annual checkup. As I walked into the building, a white woman who was maybe in her 50s saw me heading toward the elevator and tried to hit the "close door" button (she still had her finger on it when I got in). When I finally got into the elevator, she huddle herself in the corner like a frightened woodlands creature. I just looked at her, rolled my eyes and shook my head.

When the elevator stopped, I let her get off first as any Southern gentleman should do. When she stepped out of the elevator, she glanced over her shoulder as if to which way I was headed. I just stood behind her to give her time to get the hell out of my way. She turned left and so did I since that was where my doctor's office is. The entire length of the hallway, she kept glancing over her shoulder behind her and I just kept my distance. I also noticed that there were security cameras around. If this woman claimed that I had done something to her, I would have proof that I didn't. Then finally, out of no where she stopped, backed up against the wall and stayed there until I passed. I just walked on by shaking my head.

When I rounded the corner, she was still standing there against the wall. I stopped just to take a look back around that same corner and she had continued her walk toward my present direction. I continued on to my destination wondering why she was scared of me and wondering how I could have been so intimidating to her. Was she scared of men? I think not, since she was talking to the white man that got off before I got on. Was she scared of Black men? Probably so. But even though I was a little upset, I brushed it off as just another dumb ass white woman.

And this is how I know that God works magic when it needs to be worked.

After my visit, I headed back down the aforementioned hallway back to the elevator and saw that the door was closing. Suddenly the elevator door reopened and there was another white woman in probably in her 70s who was holding the "door open" button. On the short way down to the 1st floor, she asked me how my day was and I replied and and asked her the same. This short little interaction put a smile on my face and let me know that all white women aren't scared of us.

Each time something like this happens, it saddens me a little bit more that this still goes on. It happened again today except this time it was some gay white man grabbing his man purse when I walked toward his direction in Starbucks. It makes me wonder if I look that menacing and intimidating.

Do I need to soften my look and be sure to smile. But then I thought, why in the hell would I change myself to make others feel comfortable? I'm not the one with the problem, they are. And it's up to them to change themselves and their thinking.

Excuse You

I'm at the gas station on Tuesday putting some air in my tires. I'm already non-trusting of people so I'm always checking my surrounding. In the corner of my eye, I see this young white dude walking up to me. He gets about 8 feet away from me starts to speak.

YWB- "Hey man, go get me a pack of Newport lights from the store" as he attempts to hand me money.

Me: "Nope. I can't do that"

YWB: "Why not"

Me: "Muthafucka I ain't going to jail for your young ass! Now get the hell away from me!"

Now, I wasn't appalled that he approached me for cigarettes in the least bit. What pissed me off was that the lil bastard TOLD me to go get him some cigarettes. Not asked, TOLD!!!!!!!!

Seriously like WTFis up with kids these days.!!!!!!!!!!!

Not To Be Ungrateful, But...

Today I had my annual review. The purpose of the review would be to determine how much of a pay increase I would get. All I can say is that I am sorely disappointed in the review process and the amount of my raise.

I was provided no documentation on what criteria were being reviewed.

There was no introduction of who all was on the call.

I had no idea of what the average amount of the merit raise was.

So we continued the call and I was showered with accolades for "stepping up" my game and taking on new projects, such as 500 room hotel conversions and kiosk installations. I was also told of what projects that I would be expected to learn and implement.

Then they hit me with the "well your only bad point is that you didn't finish your online training in a timely fashion". I accepted responsibility for it and explained why I took so long *that was a lot of shit to do*

Then it got down to the money. I was given a raise that doesn't even come close to the national average. Now a raise of any kind is always good. But what pissed me off was that they called it a MERIT raise. I was given the same amount as everyone else! The reason that I am pissed and disappointed is that I have worked my ass of for the last 2 years on this job. I have asked for extra projects, have been given them, and completed them with flying colors. I have always turned my reports in on time. I have done everthing right and excelled above what I was supposed to do. And I was awared with the same thing that everyone else got! I think that's bullshit! Why have I been busting my ass? Why? I could have just done enough to get by like other people.

Now normally I would have said something while on the call, but I couldn't. I couldn't for a very important reason. I have just applied for a new position within our project. Now, the position requires that the person taking it live in Memphis, TN so that they can work in the office. But, because no one is willing to move to that city, they are considering letting the position be remote. That means that the person could work from home. There would also be about a 33% raise over what I am making now. I didn't say anything because I didn't want to jeopardize my chances at getting that position.

At this point, I have made a decision that if I am not promoted to the new position, I will start to seek other employment. I fully understand that "the economy" is faltering and all, but my work load has increased significantly. Now if everyone had been given the same work load and we all performed at the same level, I wouldn't have a problem. But like I said, I have WORKED MY ASS OFF while others haven't.

Now I don't want anyone worried that I am going to up and quit my job. I am not foolish enought to do that. Now if I win this $34 million lottery, then it's another story. But what I will do is start looking to see what is out there that pays me what the industry average is. I'll do a my research to see the sustainability of the companies that are doing the hiring and then pinpoint what I want to do. I'm not stupid when it comes to my livelihood. And I also think that it's high time that I get serious about graduate school.

I can imagine that most people in this position would be pissed the fuck off right now. And I am!!!


Text in red were not part of the original post and were added after the first 2 comments.

Excedrin RT

I think that this is the funniest faux commercial ever made! Especially from when she says "Oh no you didn't". Why? Because it points out things that black people go through everyday.

I had to let a caucasian co-worker have it yesterday because he called me racist! I had to explain to him that i'm not racist, i'm conditioned to react to white people.
Here's what happened.

He said that he had to go to the bathroom. When he came back, I asked him if he had washed his hands. I asked that because he has a bad habit of touching people when he talks to them. He asked why I asked him and I told him *and yes I was wrong* that I noticed that white people don't wash their hands when they use the bathroom. He called me racist and that's when I had to let him have it.

First I explained to him that racism is a hatred or intolerance of people of other races. It's also a belief that inherent differences among the various human races is what determines cultural or individual achievement. I don't subcribe to that belief nor do I hate any person because of their race. So I told him that the next time he decides to call someone out of their name, to please know what he is calling him.

I then went on to explain to him that he would never know what it feels like to experience the prejudice in the same form that a Black person does each and every day. He doesn't get the stares when he goes shopping. He doesn't experience white women getting off of an elevator when he gets on. He doesn't have to worry about being thought of as less than because of his skin color. He doesn't have to experience any of the racial bullshit that other minorities, especially Black people, have to experience. One of my Latino co-workers even joined in the conversation to get him straight.

But after all of that talking, he didn't understand and I told him that he never will. I knew that he didn't understand when he said "ya'll need to just get over it". At that point I was done with him. I haven't spoken to him since and don't think that I will.

People Get On My Nerves

It seems that people love to fuck with me at the airport. Read this or this for the 2 other encounters I blogged about.

So i'm in the airport in Atlanta waiting for my flight to Tampa today. I walked up to the gate with my Orange Chicken and lemonade from Panda Express, I sat down and started to eat my food. When I arrived at the gate, I noticed a line of about 20 people at the gate counter. I then overheard the gate agent tell the people in line to please have a seat and they would be called when their seats were assigned. Apparently, they were passengers on standby who missed their earlier flight due to weather and long lines at security. Some of them took seats and some of them decided to remain standing in line.

A second gate agent was handling passengers who were already confirmed on the flight. Just as I finished eating, she called my and the names of 2 other people to come pick up new boarding passes for upgraded seats (it pays to fly an airline exclusively). So I get up and walk to the counter. While standing in the line for upgraded and confirmed passengers, a guy in the standby line (white, of course) picks ME (the only black guy) out of a line of people to tell me something.

White Guy: Sir you're going to have to go the end of the line and wait like the rest of us.

Me: No I don't.

White Guy: And just why not?

Me: I don't because I was called up here by the gate agent. I'm flying first class and you're flying standby in coach. So could you please go back to your standby line?

*He then steps back into his line looking stupid as hell*

White Guy: Sir i'm so sorry...

Me: Please don't aplogize to me for your racial prejudice. Just change your mindset about Black people.

And with that, I picked up my first class boarding document and boarded the plane.

Here I am a Delta Gold Medallion member minding my own fucking business and this white guy decides to pick me out of a line of people to tell me that I need to go back to the end of the line. Why the hell didn't he address the 2 white guys who approached the desk at the same time I did? Sometimes, white people get on my fucking nerves with their prejudiced thoughts and actions. It's like they think that they are entitled to everything and other races are supposed to cater to them. Experiences like these can cause a person to honestly become prejudiced also and i'm trying my best not to become what have experienced.

But you know what? I've learned that this shit is going to happen just because I'm black. And it's going to happen for the rest of my life. I can't hate the entire white race because I encounter some stupid individuals who think the worst of my race.

Really?

I love this segment on Saturday Night Live, so I figured that I would start my own!!! Now these aren't all my personal experiences, but some that people I know have had drama about also.

1. Really, so you have to ask me everything under the sun when you can find out shit on your own. REALLY! When I say, "I don't know", you get upset and say "well you act like you know everything." REALLY! I don't know everything, I just know how to find out about the things that I want to know about. Ever heard of GOOGLE? I mean REALLY!!!!!!

2. Really, so you don't want to drive your car when we go somewhere because gas is expensive. REALLY! So i'm guessing that you thinkt that I get a discount on gas or something! Well guess what, I don't. And my car uses premium instead of regular like yours does. So if you don't want to drive, from now on you will not be going! I mean REALLY!!!!!!

3. Really, so i'm single because I don't know how to treat a man. REALLY! So are you single because you treat them so well? REALLY! I have seen cheat on every man that you have been in a relationship with. I remember back in 1998 when you asked me to lie to your boyfriend, so that you could fly to another city to fuck another dude. I mean REALLY!!!!!!

4. Really, so you thought that just because we met and I invited you over to my house that I was inviting you for sex. REALLY! No nigga! I had already told you that I was abstaining from any sexual contact for the next 3 months! Did you think that by stripping down to your undies while I was in the kitchen would make me change my mind? I mean REALLY!!!!!

5. Really, so you think that just because I have Delta Skymiles that i'm going to get you a free ticket every time you ask. REALLY! I got you a ticket last year at Christmas because you said that your grandfather was on his death bed. And I even paid the fucking $50 last minute booking fee! But it just seems so strange that your grandfather has been alive and well all year. Now you need another ticket because he is sick, but you don't need it until Christmas. Kiss my ass. I mean REALLY!!!!!!

6. Really, so you think that your 5th annivearsary with your boyfriend is more important than my 30th birthday. REALLY! I should forget that my birthday is a week after your planned party and spend my money to fly up there instead of the trip that I usually take for my birthday. Nah playa, I think that my birthday is more important to me. I mean REALLY!!!!!

7. Really, so you thought that because I let you spend the night that you could just wake me up at 7am. This after I told you that I don't get up until 10am on my days off. REALLY! And you said that you only did it because you wanted me to get up! What the hell kind of reason is that? Was the apartment on fire? Was my car being stolen? And you are surprised that I don't want to date you anymore? I mean REALLY!!!!!!

8. Really, I know that we are friends and all, but why do you think it's cool to just invite yourself over to my house? A text message that says, "im on my way over to your house because I need to use your computer" does not an invite make. If you want to come over and use my computer, ask. Did you ever stop to think that I may not be in the best mood for company. I mean REALLY!!!!!

9. Really, why is it that when we go out and the check comes, you always leave it there on the table. REALLY! Do you think that I always have to pay? And you make about 50% more per year than I do and just bought a brand new car! The next time that we go out, I'll wait until after you have ordered your food and 3 drinks and tell the server that we will have separate checks. That will show your ass! I mean REALLY!!!!!!

10. Really, what are some of you all's REALLY moments that you have experienced or seen others experienced? I have seen some of my friends go through some of these experiences as I have myself. I mean REALLY!!!!!!

************************Added Bonus**********************

Bonus-Really, must you complain and bitch about and hate on Atlanta, Georgia. I mean REALLY!!!! If you don't like our traffic problems or abundance of Gay and Black Men, or anything else then stay the fuck away from the city. If you have a business trip here, tell your boss that you are afraid that you are gonna get stuck in traffic and that a Gay Black Man may hit on you, and don't want to go. I mean REALLY!!! I'm gonna guess that your city has traffic that flows 24/7 and has no Black Gay Men. I mean REALLY!!!! Do you really have to go bashing the city of Atlanta because you moved here with no job, thinking you were going to find the job and man of your dreams? But instead of those, you ended up taking yo ass back home to (gay)Moma cause you were to lazy to get off your ass and find either one! I mean REALLY!!!!! Stop all of the fucking Atlanta, bashing. It's getting old. I mean REALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's All My Doing

Imagine that you are feeling bad about the state of your life. Now imagine realizing that all of your misfortune is a result of your doing. That's what's on my mind right now.

I just can't be happy about my life. But I feel even worse when I realize that everything that has led me to where I am, has been my doing.

I just can't win. I can't even get ahead.

I'm sick of feeling this way, but I swear that I just can't get off the ground.

What the fuck am I supposed to do?

Politics and Religion

I don't discuss the topics and I tell people that when they attempt to engage me in the discussion of that subject or religion. I don't even like discussing either one on my blog. Why? Because the discussion always leads to an argument if at least 2 people have opposing or non-mathing views.

Case in point: I got a text message last night from a friend of mine who lives in Memphis. The text convo went as follows:

RH: Vote for Obama in 08.

Me: I think i'm voting for Hillary Clinton.

RH: Lord another sell out. Trying to keep a Black man out of the White House.

Me: I'm not gonna vote for him just because he is black.

RH: SELL OUT. Why can't you support the Black man?

Me: Did you vote for Alan Keyes or Al Sharpton in the 04 Presidential election?

Me: Do you shop at Black-owned stores in your own neighborhood? Do you buy Hip/Hop and Rap music of artist just because they are black? *he purports to only buy gospel music*

RH: I guess you proved my point *as I thought "WTF", how did I prove your point?*

Me: This is why I don't discuss politics and religion. Keep those opinions to yourself. You are officially on my shit list.


And this people, is why I don't discuss politics or religion. If you have a different outlook from another person, then you are part of the evil sect that must be destroyed. I guess that if this church-fiend friend finds out that I don't believe in Jesus or human-organized religion, then our friendship is over. Oh well.

You will never ever hear me attempt to persuade someone to believe the things that I believe. And I hate when other people try to force their beliefs or choices on me. I leave people to believe in what they want to and act as they want to act and I would love the same courtesy. As I always say, what one person eats will never make me shit.

Boy Crazy

Do you have a friend who just goes crazy over every man that he thinks is cute, sexy, fine, or attractive? I'm sure that you do. I have quite a few.

This is the friend that will miss an exit on the highway just to get a good luck at a man that he sees driving next to him.

He or she will go in the store at the gas station and buy a pack of gum because the guy at the counter is cute.

This person will ask you to drive around the corner one more time just so that he/she can look at a dude again that was washing his car.

They snap their necks in the direction of any man that walks by.

These people stop talking mid convo and forget what the hell they were conversing about when a dude walks by.

But don't let the dude that they saw from a mile away be unattractive, they feel disappointed when they get that good look.

Now this person has no intention of saying anything to the dude and is even scared to look him in the eye. They just want to get a good look. But please don't ask me to go out of my way so that you can LOOK at a dude that you have no intentions of saying anything to.

Now I have been guilty of this. Sometimes a brotha is just that damn sexy. I was driving the other day and saw a dude at the bus stop with no shirt on and a body of dreams. I screamed "damn he fine", but by the time I got to the next traffic light, I had forgotten about him.

I fully understand that that 6'6" dark chocolate brotha with the dreads, baggy basketball shorts, six pack, and ample booty can cause you to pause, but damn don't lose your damn mind! And please don't follow the dude around!

What Would You Think, Say, Feel?

"Come over for a quickie."

This is the message that Hollywood got yesterday morning from a fellow flight attendant before his flight to Dallas.

"Are you still up? I need a massage."

This is the text message that Hollywood got just after midnight last night.

What would you think?

What would you feel?

What would you say?


It's been 6 weeks that we have been seeing each other, and as of this moment, there is no standing committment between us to be monogamous. But when I glanced over and saw these messages, I had a strange feeling. Not jealous, just strange.

I didn' t know what to think, say, or feel. So I did something that I usually don't do. I left it alone. I didn't feel like talking about it or feeling any kind of way or thinking anything of it.

But then I woke up the next morning and I did feel something. I felt as though he hasn't been honest with me. I thought that he wasn't being honest with me when I asked him if he was seeing someone or had the intentions of seeing someone in the future. I said nothing to him.

What will I think in the future? What will I feel in the future? What will I say in the future?

But as of 12:26pm on this Wednesday, May 16th, 2007, I still don't know what to feel.

I Worry

I worry that since I am gay, I can be attacked for that very reason. People don't know anything other than the fact that I am gay and want to assault me.

I worry that since I am gay, I will be denied some career opportunity. Once the fact is verified, I can be fired, or not even offered a position just because someone doesn't like my "lifestyle".

I worry that since I am gay, I will be denied the right to adopt children. People think that I can't be a good parent and raise well adjusted children.

I worry that since I am gay, people will think that I am a sex-staved, party-hearty, drug-abusing, sissy who preys on "straight" married men. I am none of the aforementioned.

I worry that since I am gay, I will always be disliked or even hated. People can love and like you until they find out that you are gay. Once that little tidbit is leaked or spilled, their whole image of you changes. You become everything that they hate.

I worry that since I am gay, I will not have a close relationship with my family. I don't want them to look at me "the gay person" in the family. But to look at me as me.

I worry that since I am gay, I will be subjected to ridicule and harassment. Straight people feel that gay people are less than them and that gives them the right to ridicule gays people.

Since I am gay, I do have a lot to worry about. More than just the few items that I have mentioned above. But I refuse to live my life in fear of what other people may do or say or think of me. I have made it a goal to be as happy as I possibly can despite the negative influences that surround me.

Better Left Unsaid

In the past I use to say whatever was on my mind no matter if it made someone upset, pissed them off, or offended them. I honestly didn't care. I felt like letting people know how I felt about things was the most important thing. But as I have gotten older, I have learned that some things are just better left unsaid. In other words, I shut the fuck up when my mind says "shut the fuck up."

I wrote this post because a blogger (this one) left a comment on my post about my Current Interest. It reads as follows.

"And, what's so diffrent about this one? Something tell (sic) me in a few weeks we will be reading why this one did not work out..look from within.."

Now when I first read it, I just brushed it off. But then I left a comment my damn self because I kept asking myself, "was that comment really necessary"? I read all of the other comments and they mostly were of the encouraging type. I'm cool with those. But this particular comment just smelled of negativity. I just couldn't understand why he left it until I read his blog. So I left a comment of my own.

"This one is different because he is taking a very active role in getting to know me. He is paying attention to my actions and reactions and learning from them. And I am doing the same with him.

And if in a few weeks, you are hearing that it didn't work out, then oh well. I just didn't work out."

I know that I have dated many guys trying to find one with whom I am compatible, so I know my track record. I date to find what I want and don't want in a dude. If I am dating someone and I see that it isn't working out, I stop dating him. It's a simple as that. And in my almost 2 years of blogging, I have posted about my experiences with most of them. But this is the first comment of this type that I have gotten. Believe me when I say that it took me for a loop.

Now granted, he wasn't obliged to leave an encouraging message, but damn, did he have to imply that I am not capable of dating someone longer than a few weeks and the "problem" is me. Maybe I am not capable of dating long term and the problem is me, but like I said, some things are just better left unsaid. I make it a point not to leave negative or discouraging comments on others' blogs. Why rain on someone's parade?

I say all this to point to an old adage that says "If you don't have something good to say, don't say anything at all".

Imus, Imus, Imus

This post doesn't have a direction, it's just to get some shit off my chest about this Imus bullshit.

Imus's ass should have been fired a long time ago. If I were to say something like that on my J-O-B then I would be fired on the spot and sent packing. He and his accomplice were wrong for saying what they said on national radio. Did they not know that there would be consequences? But the reason that Imus was fired is not what he said, but because he lost sponsorship Old Boss upstairs couldn't care less what Imus says as long as he doesn't lose money.

In fact, I am glad that Tim Hardaway, Ann Coulter, and Don Imus have spoken their minds. It just reminds people that there are still discriminatory people in the world. People have started wearing rose-colored glasses thinking and believing that all is well and that there is no discrimination or hatred. These 3 people have shown us that we gaven't gotten far. If not for laws and regulations, we as black people would still be living by Jim Crow laws. Don't believe me, ask Mr. Imus if he would like to be able to tell one of those "jiggaboos" to move from a table that he wants in a restaurant.

The reason that we as minorities are allowed to make fun of white people with no fanfare is simple. We don't hate them and internalize it like they do us. When white people attempt to poke fun at black folk for our ways and customs, they do it with malice. Not humor.

I do not look at a white man with disdain or a white woman with contempt in my heart. But when a white man looks at me, I wonder what's he thinking of me. If I get on an elevator and a white woman get's on after me, I get off. For the most part, I think that white people hate or at least don't like minorities. They are scared of us because they don't understand our culture. They are scared of us because they are not exposed to us. Have you ever noticed how little white children will stare at you for hours when they see you? Watch one of them one day.

As much as I travel, I see this shit all of the time. White people honestly feel that their race makes them better than us. And this is a worldwide phenomenon. Ask Thierry Henry of the French National soccer team how many times he has been insulted with racial epithets in European countries. As your minority neighbor how may instances of discrimination they have witness to or been a victim of this year. See what they say.

This shit is never going to end because white people won't let go of the stereotypes and beliefs that have long ago been proven as bullshit. No matter what we do, the will still see a "nigger" when they see a Black person. They will still see a "spic" when they see a Hispanic person. They will still see a "kike" when they see a Jewish person. They will still see a "chink" when they see an Asian person. They will still see a "towel head" when they see a Middle Eastern person. This shit ain't gonna end.

I'm Tired and I'm Staying Single Until...

After years and years of dating and relationships, I think that I have reached my breaking point. I'm tired.

I'm tired of men and all that come with them.

I'm tired of wasting time with men that have nothing going for them.

I'm tired of men who can't/won't tell the truth.

I'm tired of men who have no car.

I'm tired of men who expect too much.

I'm tired of men who "just need a little help".

I'm tired of men who can't keep a commitment.

I'm tired of men who don't know how to return a phone call.

I'm tired of men who can't speak their minds.

I'm tired of men who are passive.

I'm tired of men who don't have shit to show for their lives.

I'm tired of men who can't get off of their mothers' breast.

I'm tired of men who can't see another opinion about something.

I'm tired of men who can't keep a clean house.

I'm tired of men who can't come visit me at my house.

I'm tired of men who have no money.

I'm tired of men who blame others for their problems.

I'm tired of men who only want to have sex, but say otherwise.

I'm tired of men who can't compromise.

I'm tired of men who say one thing, but to another.

I'm tired of men who have bad credit.

I'm tired of men who live with a "friend until they can get an apartment".

I'm tired of men who want to know "can you take me..."

I'm tired of men who have no backbone or balls.

I'm tired of men who have bad breath.

I'm tired of men who live beyond their means.

I'm tired of men who don't act their age.

I'm tired of men who smoke cigarettes.

I'm tired of men who smoke weed.

I'm tired of men who aren't trying to better themselves.

I'm tired of men who say that they don't want children.

I'm tired of men who have no common sense.

I'm tired of men and from this point I think that it's time that I stay single.

I will stay single until I meet a brotha that makes me feel comfortable with him.

I will stay single until I find a brotha who is compatible with me.

I will stay single until I meet a brotha who doesn't make me say "he's ok, but..."

I will stay single until I decide to date again.

I will stay single until I just can't take being single anymore.

I will stay single until I meet a man that wants to go out on a real date.

I will stay single until I meet a man that is courteous in all aspects

I will stay single until I get what I want.

I might just have to stay single forever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jury Duty

People are always fucking with me and I have to curse a bitch out at least once a week!

If you have ever seen the Queens of Comedy, you may remember Sommore saying "they was fucking with me" when she was in jail. She said that she was minding her own business and people kept fucking with her. Her reply was "leave me lone, Bitch leave me lone." I know how she feels. It seems that at least once a week, someone will do something to piss me off. I never invite confrontation, but I damn sure am not going to back down from it.

Let me tell you what happened. On Monday I had to attend jury duty selection at the Dekalb county courthouse. As anyone who has done this, knows that it's boring and people get irritated and agitated having to sit and wait to be called for selection. Well during the wait, the lady next to me, Jennifer and I started small talk while she was on her laptop. A little while later, we were all told that we had 15 minutes to go get something to eat or smoke or whatever. Jennifer went over to Chick-Fil-A to get something to eat. Apparently, while she was there she stepped on a packet of mayonnaise and it landed on a man's suit. Neither she, nor the man knew that the incident had occured.

When she got back and sat down to eat, this woman with a bad weave and bad teeth turned around to Jennifer and said "Now you know you got mayonnaise on that man's nice suit". Jennifer told her that she didn't know it, but if she had then she would have apologized and paid for his suit to be cleaned. To that, ghetto heffa said, "that man probably had something important to do and you messed up his good suit". Jennifer repeated her earlier statement and even apologized to the woman. To that the bitch said, "If it was me, I would have cursed yo black ass out". Jennifer was trying to remain calm and professional, but all around could see that she was visibly upset by this ghetto ass bitch in front of her.

And this is where I come in. I whispered to Jennifer to let it go and not worry about it because she had no idea that it happened and that no one was hurt in the incident. Ghetto bitch turned to me and said "And who the fuck are you"? I told her that I was trying to be the voice or reason to calm Jennifer down, because she was upset. Ghetto bitch then told me "if you want to be the voice of reason, meet me outside and we can take care of this right now". And that's when I went the fuck off. My imaginary clip-on earrings and snatch-off wig were on the floor! I told Ghetto bitch " you ain't got to meet me outside, cause after I finish whooping yo ass out there, the police are gonna drag me back in here and arrest me. And the next trial in this muthafucka will be mine for killin yo ass!"

Ghetto bitch then said some inaudible shit under her breath. I told her that if she was woman enough to "take it outside" then she should be woman enough to talk about me to my face. I told her that she had no reason to come back into the selection room starting shit because the situation had nothing to do with her. I also told her that if the man hadn't been white, she would not have brought up the subject at all. Then some white man turned around as if to say something. To him I said "stay out of black folks business". He turned his stunned ass back around and continued reading his newspaper. After I finshed my speech, neither one of them said anything to anyone again.

Now some may say after reading some of my post that I have a temper issue or that I am highly sensitive or even that I carry around a lot of anger. I don't think that I do. I just believe in saying what's on my mind so that people will know where I stand. If someone gives me bad service some place where I am spending money, I am going to say something. If someone says something that offends me, I am going to speak my mind. If someone disrespects someone close to me, I am going to say something if they don't. I am not a passive, let-it-go type of person. I never have been and I never will be.

Bank of Information

Welcome to Bank of Information. I'm Norris and how I can help you?

I am sick and tired of being the source of information for everyone. Why the hell do people call me or contact me for information that they can easily find out for themselves? Why do you ask me shit that you can think about and answer for yourself? Why do you ask me shit of which you know that I don't know the answer? Why is it that after I give you a dumb look or a few curse words, can you figure it out for yourself? Most of the time, I will give the information requested, but I am tired of being depended upon to do and know everything. A few examples:

A person that I dated for a few weeks last year called me and asked me if I knew of a good insurance company. I told him that I used Blue Cross Blue Shield and that he should try them. He then asked me what were their rates and coverage. I asked him how I would know that information and that I don't work for BCBS. He says "fine, you don't have to get an attitude." I told him, "you don't have to call me." He hung up all pissed, but called me right back to ask me the number to call for BCBS. I hung the hell up on him.

My ex-boyfriend, Dreads, decided to come visit me this past weekend. Mind you that he has been to my house several times before and black folk have a rule. If you visit more than 2 times, you should know where everything is, so make yourself at home. He wanted a plate to fix himself something to eat. I was in the bathroom brushing my teeth when he came in and asked me "where are the plates?" I just scowled at him like I wanted to claw his eyes out. I asked him "you mean to tell me that you came all the way to the other side of the apartment to ask me that when you could have just opened the cabinets and looked?" He replied, "well I guess I could have just done that." Yes mister, you could have!

Beatmug and I went to see Dreamgirls on New Years day (my second time). He was pulling into the parking lot and started looking for a parking space. He saw a half empty lot and asked me "is it safe to park here." I just pretended to not hear him. I really wanted to say "how in the hell should I know." When he realized that I didn't answer, he muttered "you dirty bitch, how you gone make me think for myself" and pulled into the parking lot. We both laughed about that one because he knew why I didn't answer the first question!

One of my friends from DC called me and asked me what was a good hotel to stay in in New York. He reasoned that because I travel a lot, I should know all of the good hotels. I told him that I wasn't a travel agent and was not gonna research for him.

My brother called me and asked me to sign him up for Delta Skymiles. I asked him if he had access to the internet. When he said yes, I told asked him why he needed me to do it. I then told him to log onto Delta.com and click on Skymiles. When he did that he screamed out "oh, I can do this."

I have been in the grocery store and people have asked me where something is. I don't even answer them anymore. I just walk off. How in the hell would I know where anything is if I don't work there.

I have been in fast food places and people will ask me the price of something when it's right on the f-king board above their heads.


I know that you all are gonna say that this is petty and that I could just be nice and give them the information. But i'm sorry, it's tiring to be someone else's brain. Whenever I need something, I find out for myself. I don't immediately go and ask someone else something when I can find out myself. I don't call people to ask them for a phone number to Domino's Pizza when I can look it up for myself. But on the other hand, when I have a question to ask, no one seems to know the answer. So it's time for the Bank of Information to close. If you want to know something, do like I do and Google it! And if I do answer your question, here is my price list:

Answers-$50
Right Answers-$100
Dumb Looks-Free