WARNING: This post is about gay sexual positions. It is a very open and upfront post. You may actually learn something. Read at your own risk.
In the gay world, when it comes to sex, you must be put into a category. If not, then you confuse the hell out of people. I've heard stories that back in the day (i.e. anytime before the 90s), you either took dick or you gave it. There was no inbetween. You either took dick in the ass (bottom) or you gave dick to the ass (top). Then around the 90s, gay men realized that you didn't have to be relegated to one position or the other. Thus came the role of versatile. A versatile man was neither a top or bottom. He gladly gave and received dick. Then there was the man that was a top, but would give up a little ass every now and then. He was called a verstile/top. And the man that was a bottom that gave up some dick every now and then was called a versatile/bottom. Finally, there was the man that didn't have anal sex at all, but he would suck a mean dick. He was called oral and was largely disregarded as selfish with his dick or ass.
On some occasions when a man first has sex with another man, he does not know his sexual position. He may have no clue. But on other occasions, he may know that he only wants to penetrate someome or have someone penetrate him. There are also some people who start out their sex lives in one position and switch to another. Sexual desires are fluid like that.
When it comes to myself, I have hit just about every point on the sexual position map. It all seemed to depend on who I was having sex with. There have been some men who wanted me to be their top, some who wanted me to be thier bottom, and some who wanted some versatility. I USE to be happy as long as I was getting me some tongue, dick, or ass. I don't use any of the labels mentioned earlier. I like to call myself adaptable. I can be whatever my partner wants me to be. But if forced (as if that would ever happen) to choose one, I would have to say that I was a versatile/bottom.
Most guys would never admit to being any kind of bottom even if they are. They still think in that old mentality that bottom equals feminine or weak. Well, I can tell you that it means neither. The only thing that it means is that you like to be penetrated. That's it. Nothing else to explain. Admitting that I like dick is nothing to me. Having had my share of versatility, I know that I like dick more than I like ass. When I was younger, it didn't matter, but as I got older learned that I liked and wanted one more than the other.
To be honest, when I penetrated a guy, he got a lot more out of it than I did. To me, the only good part of doing it was the end result. The orgasm. That was it. All of that work and the whole time I was doing it, I felt virtually nothing until the end. Well sometimes. A few dudes had that ass that put a grip on my dick and made my eyes go white. But on the other hand, when I am being penetrated, it feels good from start to finish. A lot of times, I can feel it all over my body. Read this post to understand that.
I think that it's because I am better at being a bottom than I am at being a top. I know what to do and how to do it to make sure that I get the feeling that I want and the same for my partner. I find that making sure that I am having a good time will ensure that he is too. I know how to arch my back according to his height. I know to squeeze when he pulls out and to relax when he goes back in. I know how to hold my legs a certain way for each position. I know to not rest on his legs when I am riding so that he can have some control. I know that when he gets his rhythm going, I have to match it with mine. And #1, I know to have a clean ass! I am better at being a bottom because I know what to do.
When I am penetrating someone, the only thing that I do it pile drive that ass. I don't know all of the different methods and all of that shit and have never wanted to learn. But all the guys that I have done seemed to enjoy it. One guy that I was dating started out penetrating me, but I did him the first time and never got any dick from him again. In fact, no one has since then.
Now as far as having a husband, I would like a guy who is a versatile/top. I may only want some booty 3 or 4 times a year, but I want him to enjoy giving me that booty. When I was with Dreads, he would do it, but he hated it. Seeing him ACT like he was dying was such a turn off. I guess he thought that if he acted like it was killing him, I would have sympathy and not want to do it again. But I would do him because he had a good, plump, tight booty. He would just have to suffer through it and I wouldn't look at his face. But I want a dude that is gonna WANT to be penetrated every so often. I like being being penertrated, but my dick is not retired!
So all in all, I like dick. Does that make me a bottom? Maybe in your book, but to me it just means that I like dick!
So all in all