Sunday, July 12, 2009

One Of The Definitions of...

...the word CONSISTENT is: constantly adhering to the same principles, course, form, etc. I don't think that a lot of men understand what this word means, so I have decided to blog about it.

How many of us have met a guy and he says all the right things to get you to like him or be attracted to him? We all have haven't we? How many of us have also had that guy to call you, visit, text you or whatever multiple times a day? We all have haven't we? How many of you have seen those call decrease over the few weeks after meeting that guy until they cease? We all have haven't we?

I recently had this happen to me with a guy that I had really started to think could be consistent. I won't even bother giving him a blog name because it's pointless now. We met and had a nice date. We talked a couple times a day. We sent and received text messages dozens of times a day. We spent time together when I wasn't traveling. Then after that first month, I noticed that the "good morning" and "good night" texts and calls were less frequent. Then he couldn't come over or didn't have time for me to visit him.

I never stopped with my calls, text, or desire to visit or go on a date. I never do. If we start out calling each other on our lunch break, i'll continue that every single day. If we start in the morning or before bed, i'll continue that. If we start visiting twice a week, i'll continue doing that. This is called consistently and I belive it in. I also believe that if this consistency is interrupted, then something could me amiss. And I will address it.

So me being me, I called him and asked him if he was actually single and available to date and if so, if he wanted to date and continue to get to know me. His reply was "I am single, but at this point in my life, I have too much going on to date someone. I would like to continue to get to know you, but i just don't have time to date." I wasn't shocked, upset or anything else because I knew that something wasn't right. My reply to him was "I don't want to just get to know someone, I want to seriousy date and form a relationship. Because you don't have time to date, I believe that it's best for us to cease contact". He attempted to convince me to change my mind, but I was done and I told him goodbye. I don't understand how you can get to know someone without actually dating. Truth be told, I didn't know there was a difference.

When people break from what they normally do, something makes them it. If a person deviates from a habit or regular function for no apparent reason, I begin to wonder why. Something caused them to change course and I will ask why. No doubt about it, I will ask.

What I don't understand is why when dating, people can't be consistent. And if they can't be consistent, why they can't communicate what they truly feel to you so you can make an informed decision on what you want to do with them? I truly don't understand it. I can do it, so why can't they?

I have attemtped to date so many of these inconsistent and non-communicative brothas that I have become fed up. But unlike others, I won't become bitter and become one of them. I'll continue to be same ole consistent Norris and hope for the best.

That's all I have to say.

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Blogger B said...

man i'm so glad u let that azz clown know whatsup! don't play me play lotto, you'll have a better chance lol!! being consistent, honest, and having integrity go hand in hand.

11:37 AM, July 13, 2009  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

And let the church say, AMEN!

I hear you and feel you on this post. Good for you for nipping it in the bud, because bad behavior, for some reason, is habit forming.

6:27 PM, July 13, 2009  
Blogger Bristol said...

Just started reading your blog and this is the same thing I have noticed in people. Good to shut it down now.

8:40 AM, July 14, 2009  
Blogger Keisha Kornbread said...

I've had guys try to put me on layaway and I used to settle for that. Not anymore though. Time is money and a major investment to me. I kindly refund their deposit and put myself back on the shelf.

I don't date for sport. It's expensive and exhausting.

2:58 PM, July 14, 2009  
Blogger B. Good said...

Great post. I too am a fan of consistency.

"I don't understand how you can get to know someone without actually dating. Truth be told, I didn't know there was a difference."

I was thinkin' the same thing as I was reading your post.

How do you have time to "get to know someone", but you don't have time to date? Are they really that different? I don't think so.

4:06 PM, July 14, 2009  

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