Thursday, October 16, 2008

When You Turn 30...

...your life will change. Your whole perspective on life will change and you will start to live differently.

How many of us have heard something like this before? I can say that I have heard it countless times in my life by a range of people. I heard it from family, friends, colleagues, and strangers. Each time I heard it, I would think "well, i'll see when I turn 30".

Well guess what? They were right. Since I have turned 30, the way that I look at life has changed for the better and I have come to realize some things:

1. I don't have to do anything for someone that I don't want to do. If I don't feel like helping out a friend, then I don't have to. If I don't feel like going to work, then I don't have to. If I don't want to talk to the person that I am dating today, I don't have to. I don't HAVE to do ANYTHING I don't want to.

2. Life does not have to be stressful. It really doesn't. I are stressed because I allow myself to be stressed. So what if I don't have the money to pay the power bill. Is stressing out about it going to get it paid? Hell no it isn't. I'll pay it when I can, but I won't worry about it. So what if the dude you met the other night hasn't called you since you gave him some ass. Is worrying about it going to make him call? Hell no it isn't. Let that shit go and move on. Sometimes you just have to say "Fuck It" and let shit flow on down the "Small Shit River"

3. I should have money for needs and wants. Having money to do the things you need/want to do makes life easier. One thing that I've realized since 30 is that I HAVE to take care of my needs before my wants. If I need to get an oil change, i'll do that before I head to the liquor store. If I get low on funds, at least I got what I needed first. It's not necessary to have an abundance of money, but one should never run out. For the first time in my life, i'm not in a situation where there is more month at the end of the money.

4. I don't have to have a man in my life. It totally unnecessary for my well being. I swear that I used to spend part of my day thinking about why I was single. Wondering why I wasn't in a relationship or dating someone seriously. Then I realized how much time I was wasting thinking about having/not having a man. When it's time for a man, he'll be there. But if i'm single, then that's where i'm supposed to be.

5. I am where I am supposed to be. I used to think that by the time I am XYZ age, I should be doing this or doing that. People have said shit to me like "you should have bought a house by so and so age" or "you should be saving for retirement by the time you are this or that age" "you should go back to school before you turn ABC". Well I've come to realize that life is not scripted and it will come to you as it comes to you. There is no timer on when things happen in your life.

All in all, these 5 things are helping to make me a happier person and now I'm waiting for 40. I'm gonna take my lessons learned and try to make my life easier. I also want to take these next few years to get my life the way that I want it. I've waiting long enough and wasted enough time.

Before I turned 30, I was also told that 30 is when you start to get serious about life. Now that right there, I know they weren't BSing about!

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Blogger thegayte-keeper said...

yeah 30 is a WONDERFUL age

6:21 PM, October 16, 2008  
Blogger Bernie said...

Congratulations and welcome to your 30's.

As someone fast approaching 50 (in two years), my 30's was when I definitely separated my wants from my needs, in all aspects of my life. While my 20's had been spent in a mad race to get someplace (I knew not where), when I reached 30, I realized I hadn't arrived where I thought I would be because I was chasing the wrong dream. None of it was what I wanted, but I spent the next ten years figuring out what really made me happy and where I really belonged.

Now in my 40's, I've fully accepted and embraced who I am.

6:49 PM, October 16, 2008  
Blogger jaila said...

wait till u get to 35. Life totally changed for me!!! More so than 30.

7:11 PM, October 16, 2008  
Blogger Darius T. Williams said...

Yup - the people always say there's something about turning 30.

9:35 PM, October 16, 2008  
Blogger Cocoa Rican said...

Well, I'm soon to be 40 (8/5) and I have to say that I'm actually looking forward to it. It's my badge of honor to have overcome and made it through the hard times to the happy time that my life is today. You do learn so many lessons and the biggest one of all is knowing that you don't always know everything AND that it's okay to continue fuckin' lets you know you're livin' pa.

12:37 PM, October 17, 2008  
Blogger life said...

I'm looking forward to seeing the results of your changed mindset.

8:39 PM, October 19, 2008  
Blogger Mr. Jones said...

30?? Enjoy that, old man.

12:54 PM, October 20, 2008  
Blogger houstonmacbro said...

OMG if you're stressing about 30 wait until you hit the big 40+2.

6:24 PM, October 21, 2008  
Blogger thatgirl said...

Wow...I wonder if I will feel the same when I am thirty!

7:30 PM, October 21, 2008  
Blogger Chet said...

Self Inventory.

8:02 PM, October 23, 2008  
Blogger yet another black guy said...

go on and do the damn thang mayne. but don't go back down that much in weight; you ain't all that swoll right now :)

10:37 AM, October 29, 2008  

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