Kid In A Candy Store
Atlanta really is a candy store when it comes to sexy, phyne, good-looking brothas. Last Saturday, 2 of my friends and I took a trip to 6 Flags over Georgia. From the moment we got out of the car, all 3 of us noticed that there was an abundance of attractive brothas all over the place. We saw them in all shapes, sizes, and shades of brown.
It got me to thinking about why people cheat on others. It seemed as though just as soon as I saw one that made me want to swoon and he got out of my sight, another one would appear. I would take 10 steps and see a defined brotha in a tight a-shirt *I don't like the label "wifebeater"* with a basketball booty. In the next 10 steps I would see a brotha with bulging biceps stretching his polo shirt to oblivion and calves of doom giving a pair of jean shorts hell. And then in the next 10 steps, I would see a father with his son(s) or daughter(s) and think that it's the cutest thing in the world. All of the sights would make a dude forget about the rides and wonder which brotha he wanted to ride (I swear the thought never crossed my mind).
But I kept thinking that this is one of the reasons why people cheat. It APPEARS that there is always something better within the next 10 steps *although we are judging solely on the physical*. You are with a dude that you think you are satisfied with and then BAM, another one appears and gives you some attention. Believe me, it has happened several times while I have been dating Hollywood.
I'm not saying that I condone cheating because I don't. But you have to actually be in a relationship and committed to someone before you cheat. This could be one of the reasons that keep people from forming monogamous, committed relationships. You always think that someone else is better no matter how good you are treated or how phyne your man/woman is. All I am saying is that after my experience at 6 Flags is that I can understand.
So I have to ask the question. How you do stay or become satisfied with one person if there always APPEARS to be something better out there?
Note: This post has been modified from it's original version because several readers got the wrong idea. Changes appear in blue.
posted by That Dude Right There at
7/25/2007 06:50:00 PM
15 Comments:
If you think there is something better out there then the one you're with is not who you want. Go get what you think is better. I hope it's not all based on looks though.
I think it takes for you to figure out what it is that you WANT and what it is that you NEED...then if it comes to a point where ur partner seems to give you everything you could want and need, then anyone else doesn't matter...Because as I'm sure you've found out, all the candy that looks so good isn't always sweet.
Honestly there's always going to be a prettier package out there no matter who you choose to have a relationship with. I'm not going to lie, I do tend to compare other hot guys I see to my Rock but then I think of all the good and bad times I've had with Rock and how much I've grown with him and realize that I better damn be sure the prettier package is worth throwing away a good guy for. It hasn't been in my case.
But damn...those bruhs in that pic does make one wanna...:-) I think my top 3 are:
#3 - Dark brotha, bottom left, black & turqouise strips trunks.
#2 - Mid-tone brotha bottom dead center, turquoise and white trunks.
and my #1 pick
Mid-tone brotha, top left, burgandy trunks.
Where's Rock when I need him? :-)
another case of the grass is greener mentality...
you stay statisfied when you start looking for something beyond appearance.
@D-place-I'm not gonna leave someone that I have started to invest time and energy into because I SEE something that I THINK is better.
@Valentino-I don't think that I could have said it better (because I didn't).
@E-You proved my point. One could look at all of those brothas and be able to choose the one that they like the best. But what about the attributes that come along with him? Thanks for the comment.
@Reddmann-We should not deny that appearance is what attracts us to a person.
You stop looking to others when you realize that there will ALWAYS be someone better looking (than you and your partner) so the connection has to be something you don't want to lose over a sweet piece of ass. Otherwise, stay single and keep taking ten steps... hopefully you'll never grow too old or tired to turn someone's head.
People cheat for different reasons. Some cheat because they are greedy. Others cheat because they are neglected. I don't think there is really any one answer.
Now, I am in a relationship. I see cuties ALL the time, but I am of the same mind as E. A few minutes with those "pretty" boys are not worth me risking the years I have had with MyBaby.
"How you do stay or become satisfied with one person if there always APPEARS to be something better out there?"
I guess the answer is......you don't. If you're willing to stray based on appearances alone, I'd say you were never really satisfied in the first place.
(Not my real name)
I have been the partner in the relationship who got hurt when the person who I thought loved me went searching for somebody else. As much as he tried to make excuses--he felt neglected; it was just sex; he'll never do it again--the truth was he was horny and unable to respect what we had together. I showed him the door.
There are two sides to every story. While you may be "looking" and wondering what life would be like with that hottie across the room, there's someone already in your life who will be affected if you actually cross the line.
Personally i've had enough experiences to know that in the difference between " A MAN " and " MY MAN ", the keyword is " MY ".
That's it...
Once i make a choice and i'm comfortable with it, its only when the object of my affection gives me reasons to start doubting that i start looking at others in a different way...
Other than they're all aliens in my eyes lol
For me, it's the two guys at the top with red trunks and the guy below center.
How's about this question: Is it wrong to fantasize (briefly) about someone else while you're having sex with the one you love?
as a serial monogamist, i've wondered the same thing. there will always be some super fine specimen out there, but who's to say what they bring to the table.
like my grand daddy told me, "No matter how fine they are, somebody somewhere is tired of putting up with their shit!"
"
like my grand daddy told me, "No matter how fine they are, somebody somewhere is tired of putting up with their shit!" "
Or pulling a Mya in her song Why You Gotta Look So Good...as she struggles to break up with a guy she knows is a loser but it's difficult cause he's hot and great in bed...*LOL*.
I'm in Atlanta right now and trust me when I say I understand as well. I've never seen this many attractive brothas in one city. I was in New York this past weekend and saw some hotties. Atlanta holds its own as well. Maybe this is why there's no one of note in Baltimore. :-(
Someone once said, "What separates us from animals is our ability to accessorize." Additionally, it is our ability to not act on every sexual inclination or arousing posture we find ourselves in.
I suggest stop trying to deny the attraction, rather acknowledge it, remind yourself of what you already have and why, then pat yourself on the back for not being animalistic.
-jump off JOE
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