Monday, February 13, 2006

Am I That Person?

You know how you always think "that will never be me." Or "I would never let myself be put into that situation." But when the situation happens to you, you deny it to yourself and everybody who points it out to you. You tell yourself that it's ok because your situation isn't as bad as other's that you have seen. But when it comes down to it, you are still in THAT situation.

I don't have to tell you what situation it is because you can probably figure it out. But I am going to tell you just to keep your thoughts in the right place. It's my situation with VP. It's been 3.5 months that we have been seeing each other and I have come to the conclusion that I have no idea what is going on between us. I keep thinking that while I want to progress with him, I am not sure that that is the best thing for us to do.

We still have arguments about me wanting to spend more time with him and him not making time for me. That's the only notable issue that we have. I know that my schedule and his schedule won't allow us to spend days, weeks, and hours at a time together, but when I am at home in Atlanta, I make time for him. I don't feel that he does the same for me. Although, since I have been home since Thursday we have seen each other twice. Friday morning I took him to pick up his new S500 and Sunday we spent time at my apartment burning CDs and listening to music. I told him that that was all that I really want from him. Just for us to be in each others' presence.

I think that he thinks that I want to just tie him down and get married tomorrow. A few times I have thought that I would love to do just that, but I am not trying to rush the situation. Like I have said over and over, I am doing things differently. I want to wait until I know and can feel that he really cares about me before I even entertain the thought of a relationship.

Another part of doing things differently is to think about what I am doing that won't allow the situation to progress. Because there is no formal committment between us, I feel that it's ok to meet other fellas. I told you about Infiniti in another post, but there have been a few other guys that I have met. At this point, I have decided to not go on a date with anyone else. If I keep doing that, then I can't possibly focus on us. I can't put anyone else into our situation.

I also need to control my attitude. He says that I tend to get a little hot headed when I don't get my way or get irritated. And I admit that I do. Example. The other day, I was showing him the new Jaguar XK in a magazine. When he asked me what it was, I yelled "read it and see". I immediately realized what I had done, grabbed his faced and kissed him and apologized. I have to keep outburst like that in check.

So all in all, while I have seen people in situations like the one that I am in and thought that they were crazy for staying in them, I am now in that situation myself. No one understands the situation between myself and VP, but us. So, while I have listened to other people tell me that the situation will go nowhere and that I need to drop him, I am not listening to them. Each time I think about dropping him, something tells me to remain patient and hold out. And that's just what I am gonna do.

16 Comments:

Blogger Ladynay said...

Always trust your gut, it's hardly ever wrong.....

6:51 PM, February 13, 2006  
Blogger That Dude Right There said...

Thanks Sista. My gut tells me this time to be patient and let him get to know me while I do the same with him. So that's what I am gonna do.

7:16 PM, February 13, 2006  
Blogger Trent Jackson said...

BOY...
I understand this situation all to well. When you were here we never really talked about our love lives, but thats a conversation we'll have to find time to have during the 4th...

there is nothing like the Pisces love.

12:00 AM, February 14, 2006  
Blogger E said...

Hang in there! It's good that you're trying to make it work. Hopefully VP will reciprocate.

8:51 AM, February 14, 2006  
Blogger K Kaos said...

I hope your gut is right, please don't be that person, please, I know too many fools for love, which oddly enough is my next post.

8:41 PM, February 14, 2006  
Blogger The Captain said...

I suggest you and VP sit together and discuss openly, and honestly what expectations, wants and needs are evident at this time for the both of you as an individual and together. Then chart out what can be done to accomplish those things, in short-term ranges. If he is not willing to do that or at least give it some consideration, then you two will often be busy bees at work and traveling and letting time slip away, which is precious.

11:47 PM, February 14, 2006  
Blogger BuddahDesmond said...

If something is telling you to remain patient and to hold on, go on and do just that. Give it time to work itself out. If after talking things through and after getting to know each other even better you find that you're both headed down the same path, then you should be fine.

6:04 AM, February 15, 2006  
Blogger ProfessorGQ said...

it seems that you have a lot of thinking to do about the progression of this relationship. I don't really like to give specific advice, but I convince the person to ask himself "am I happy" then work on a solution.

10:47 AM, February 15, 2006  
Blogger YUSEF said...

Get a dog...lot less work and they always lick ya..even after you scream at them.

2:43 PM, February 15, 2006  
Blogger P. Alonzo Harris Jr. said...

Happy Valentines Day....i know im late with this...lol

5:01 PM, February 15, 2006  
Blogger feels good b n FREE said...

i always useta think i'd do if a man ever put his hands on me...
useta be like "girl, i'd kill him...I'd..."

then my husband hit me...and I became the poster child for an abused woman...

who'da thunk it?

5:25 AM, February 16, 2006  
Blogger DizYaBoy said...

happy belated v-day!

3:39 AM, February 17, 2006  
Blogger jameil1922 said...

to answer your question, yes.

5:55 AM, February 18, 2006  
Blogger TrinaBeingTrina said...

I think you may be becoming that person....What is wrong with you seeing other people if you two don't have an actual commitment?

6:06 AM, February 18, 2006  
Blogger lj said...

It's funny how you can become "that guy" without even realising it's happening

5:56 AM, February 19, 2006  
Blogger That Girl said...

Men just suck! No offense!

9:02 AM, February 19, 2006  

Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home